When it comes to a SAHM leaving her husband, it's even more difficult. SAHMs don't have a source of income other than her husband's. All SAHMs work, and work hard, too. We just don't get paid for it and often don't even get recognized for it. When it comes to leaving her husband, a SAHM may have to take THEIR money as she won't have any income. Especially if it's a situation where she can't trust her husband to not cute her off. She's doing what she needs to for herself and her kids.
Why the hell wouldn't a mom take HER kids with her if she is leaving her spouse? Yes, they're the spouses kids as well and the kids should see their dad (under most circumstances) but why should the mom leave her kids behind? That can be, and really is, abandonment. Especially when it's a SAHM who is the primary care giver and there won't even be anyone to take care of the kids while the spouse is at work. Telling a mom if she leaves her husband she should leave her kids is down right cray.
I should sure as heck hope that leaving your spouse, whether for a separation or divorce, is premeditated. I don't think any sane person would make that choice lightly and just up one day and walk out. There's going to be thought behind it. Hopefully, planning, too. Especially when there are kids involved.
The mom being dragged through the mud kept it classy, simply posting that she wasn't going to comment on the details on Facebook. She's right there. No separation or divorce should play out on social media with a whole he-said-she-said-you-bitch-you-asshole debacle for all to read and judge. There's no reason to get all Real Housewives about it. Even if all your friends and family are secretly entertained, keeping a fresh bowl of popcorn handy for the next round.
No one ever knows what all exactly goes on in a marriage except the two people in it. Each has their own views, too, so even then you won't get the same story. Marriages are complicated. All relationships are. Marriages aren't easy, either. Like anything in life, there are ups and downs. Sometimes, one or both partners reaches a breaking point and decides a break, either temporary or permanent, is needed. That's never an easy choice to make. No one needs to be trashed over doing what they think is best for them, and in the case of moms, for her kids. Especially not publicly.
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I don't get why people slam sahm's especially about money. I've always thought that each parent does their thing to contribute to the family as a whole- whether it be the bread winner or the child caregiver. It's all one pot.
ReplyDeleteThat's one of the dangers of social media. People think that they can say things that they would never say to your face.
ReplyDeleteUghhhh drives me nuts when people bash the other parent... Kids aren't as clueless as adults like to think.... They don't want to hear anyone bash there mommy or daddy... Especially the other parent
ReplyDeleteI agree! All kids know is that they love their parent.
DeleteI say to each its own! Unless you're actually in their shoes you don't really know whats going on.
ReplyDeleteSo thankful that I don't live in the public eye. I would hate to have my personal matters spread across various medias.
ReplyDeleteI really don't think a public forum is appropriate for anyone's business like that. What a shame that it's so easy to hurt someone this way these days.
ReplyDeleteI totally believe that the high road is the best road in cases like this!
ReplyDeleteYeah the last thing I want to get involved in is someone's marriage let alone someone's divorce. Way too many emotions, and years of issues going on.
ReplyDeleteI don't understand why people can judge easily without hearing the other side of the story. What mom wouldn't take the kids with her if she leaves her husband?
ReplyDeleteMy daughter was a SAHM when her husband decided it was time to look for someone else. And I can't even begin to explain what she went through after that. The ex-husband and the mistress did everything they could to clear their name and she ended up being blamed for everything, at one point, the ex-husband even proclaimed that my daughter was the one who had somebody else that's why they broke up and he left. There are always two sides to a story, it's sad that most of the time, people are content with just hearing one side.
ReplyDeleteUgh. That is terrible. I can't imagine going through something as difficult as divorce, then having it blasted all over social media.
ReplyDeleteI really love to reading your post. Yes Marriage was not easy sometimes you ended with breaking up
ReplyDeleteThat is the danger of judging someone based one one person's perspective. Its really sad.
ReplyDeleteThis is a great post indeed. SAHM never get the recognition they deserve I believe. It is sad that the husband doesn't realize karma will get him later when the kids are older and see how he trashed their mother on social media. Kudos to her for not being the immature one. Thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeleteMarriage isn't always easy, I think this topic is not good in public, but the advantage of this is you can easily read what is our in mind.
ReplyDelete